i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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