My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
