we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
