I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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