your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
he shaved USA in his pubs
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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