the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
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As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
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Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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