how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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