whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
