R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
