love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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