I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
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