I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
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I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
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All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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