she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
