whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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