I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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