My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
