We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Randomize
