I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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