U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
