D3 body, D1 cock
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
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