Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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