See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I can't trust your balls anymore.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize