Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
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We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
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IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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