Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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