whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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