hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
