somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
my liver is dry heaving
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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