thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
