If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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