i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize