I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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