Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I think a kid would responsible me up
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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