Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
