just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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