So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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