I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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