Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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