i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
