glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
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