Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
