Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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