this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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