I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
