dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize