This house was built for laser tag.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
