But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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