Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
