i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Did we literally take a cab across the street
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Randomize
