I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
