It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
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Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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