I wish life had little blips of pornography
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
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I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.